Top Seven Tuesday - Topic Variation

Ok, so since the topic for this week is N/A for me, I decided to pick my own. I loved the Bergopedia I read awhile back...so this is it, the Eggopedia from my crib.

1. Small corrections, Mark! Well, we were at Prineville Reservoir one time, and we were waiting and wating in line to launch (just typed lunch..funny..made me laugh really hard..please notice the time of this post) and this young 16ish young boy was TRYING to back the boat trailer down to load. It was a flipping riot. (I am a very good backer upper now, after years of backing the boat trailer down and getting screamed at, cussed at, being called names and yes, even opening the truck door up while it was under water, allowing a tidal wave of water to flush into the truck. OOPS, DID I DO THAT? Guess you should be nicer. But I digress. ) Poor kid was needing to go to the right, but of course was turning wheels in the wrong direction, and then would punch it like he was John Force off the line in a funny car race. Too dang funny. The Dad was some yuppie Bend idiot wearing frigging Dockers to his campout and politely telling little Marky, "Small corrections, Mark!" Well, I don't think Mark was picking up what Dad was putting down. Good stuff.

2. Actuawwy...E has always had a pretty developed vocabulary. When she could barely talk, you would ask her if she wanted something, and while thinking, she would say Actuawwy....no, I don't want more milk. Too cute.

3. Pain Don't Hurt - One of our fellow cousins has spent quite a bit of time with J. J loves him dearly and I always have. He's just a bit tougher than most. J can hang with the best of them with the pain stuff, he's truly no beootch, but no match for the cousin. He was telling J one day to walk it off when something painful had occurred.....then looked at him seriously and said "Pain Don't Hurt." Uh, yeah it does.

4. No, honey, you SLEEP like a log and EAT like a hog! I was talking with my mom one day and I said geez, I slept like a hog today. She said the quote above and we both nearly died. I think I looked at her blankly and said "Thanks Mom."

5. Don't Burn The Hambfurgers If you can, try to pronounce this statement with a bit of a lisp, especially at the end of the first syllable. Rho and I were downtown at the Buffalo one night, picking up takeout burgers. We were bs-ing our cousin who was cooking down there, and this nasty creature that grew up in our town came staggering out of the bar, went up to the window and blurted that out at him. It struck us as VERY funny, because, ahem, she couldn't frigging tell if she WAS a hamburger at that point. She was pretty bulletproof.

6. You can call me Ray, You can call me "Owww, you poppin sonofabitch! It's late, so these may not be all that funny to you, but I am cracking me up. And darn it, I could use some frigging laughter in my life...so read on. Dad was cooking bacon one day and was going on about the whole "you can call me whatever, just don't call me late for breakfast." Well, the bacon popped right in the middle of his little ditty, so we got this instead. G'head, nest time you see him, call him that.

7. Rawny Scrunt J was ranting and raving about someone that had ticked him off. He was talking about how handily he could kick his skinny little arse. He was getting pretty worked up (shocker) when he blurted out that this punk was just a rawny scrunt. Beauty was, it took a pretty good delay until he realized it.